Work for you to judge. Please do, for this poem has met critics that either love it or don't seem to convinced, so I really don't know what I should do. Of course, it was written just for fun, as you will see.
One day I was out on the street I met this unique girl,
Believe me that she was the most poetic girl in the world.
She had long and full grown golden strands of wheat for hair,
Two flashing diamond stars tucked where eyes should have their lair.
Her poor pink cheeks were roses, she might just need to water them,
Maybe with her lips; they were wine and could not stand.
Her teeth were pearls; that they rolled off made her worry.
She could not speak, because her tongue was a big ripe strawberry.
Her skin was a soft mixture of cotton, silk, and lace;
She had to be pulling it or it fell about the place.
I didn't think her beautiful; I only thought her funny,
I sold her to a freak show and I made a lot of money.
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2 comentarios:
También pensé en el librito de poesías de Tim Burton... me parece muy muy bueno, el tipo de poesía bastante innovador que ese necesita. Al final me parece escuchar tu voz.. lo cual siempre es difícil de lograr para el escritor importante de obtener para el lector. Creo que en algunos momentos es un poco torpe.. como en la parte de las mejillas y la que le antecede, siento que le falta un poco de trabajo. Sin embargo, creo que en general es muy bueno.
Apoyo algunas cosas que te comentan. En general el texto me parece salido de tu cabeza con la mayor picardía posible. Siempre soñé con un texto tuyo así para mofarse de Yamil un poco, sin ofensa, eh?
Btw, creo que ya conocí a alguien así ayer, ah no...perdón, la confundí con la falsedad de aquella niña wannabe Engel! jajaja
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